Financial Intimacy Book Review

by Pam on May 22, 2010

Financial Intimacy: How To Create A Healthy Relationship With Your Money And Your Mate by Jacquette M. Timmons

Financial Intimacy is quite different from any other financially focused books I have read thus far.  I discovered this new book in our local library database and I thought I would check it out.

I read it from cover to cover and found it interesting.  The author first presents stories of several women from varying backgrounds, ethnicities, and income levels, and shows how their relationship to money affected their relationship with their mates.

The author points out throughout her book that a person’s relationship with money really dictates the rest of their lives.  In fact, she suggests that it’s really not about money at all, but how you relate to money is really all about choices and lifestyle and beliefs.  It’s important to note that most women want to feel taken care of and she refers to this as the “Prince Charming Effect”.

It is evident from the stories recounted in this book that people generally either follow exactly what they were taught by their parents regarding handling money, or they do the polar opposite, whether consciously or subconsciously.

A key point made in the book is that it is extremely important to understand your mate or your future mate’s relationship to money as it will impact your lives together in a major way whether you realize it or not.  The author provides tips to single women on what to watch for in a potential mate.  She also emphasizes the importance in understanding your own relationship to money.  Usually people who are responsible with money want to find partners that are equally responsible. Those with poor money habits want to find a mate who is better at handling money.

Another piece of advice the author provides to her readers is the idea that people should not put off their financial planning in the hopes of finding a mate someday.  Some people will never end up getting married and if they continue to hold off on buying a home, or beginning to invest in hopes of finding a mate they may end up regretting this decision.

Financial intimacy involves understanding how both you and your mate relate to money and how you relate to money as a couple.  The financial decisions you make as a team will impact your life now as well as in the future.  It is important for you to be in tune with each other on this important aspect of life instead of shying away from discussing it.

Money is considered one of America’s remaining taboos, and the commonly held perception is that we don’t talk about it.  I actually disagree with this oft-quoted view: I believe people talk about money all the time.  They are just having the wrong conversations, rarely going beyond the superficial to the substantial and significant.”

Near the end of the book, the author suggests developing 18 different habits that will help you to develop financial intimacy.  Some habits include practicing gratitude, getting enough rest, tracking your spending, giving yourself credit when it is due, and more.

This book is ideal for women seeking to attain financial intimacy with themselves and their mate and for single women who want to find a compatible mate in the future.  Financial intimacy is a relatively new topic and I think it is worth exploring further.  How we relate to money truly does speak volumes about who we are and what we want to achieve in life.

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